I Am Enough: Letting go of Mom guilt


I am Enough

I was speaking with a colleague the other day about our kids. She has a grown daughter and was a stay at home mom when her daughter was little. She asked me if time with my daughter was going by too fast. People always asked her that and she felt like passed at just the right pace because she was there with her everyday. She had the time to enjoy each phase and look forward to the next.

I thought about that for a moment and realized I feel the same way. Yes, I can’t believe that 3 years have passed since my little girl changed my life forever. But I don’t feel like it’s going TOO fast. Each day sheds light on a new aspect of that little girl’s personality. I’m learning so much about her and I can’t wait to learn more about the person she is going to become. Time has been passing by just right.

It made me feel really good about my commitment to be with her and be present for her. Don’t get me wrong – I’m far from perfect. Every time I have to tell her that I have “one more thing to finish on the computer” or “one more email to send” before we can play, I feel like I’m permanently scarring her in some way (totally didn’t mean to rhyme that!). Like each time I check my phone when we’re watching Frozen for the 152nd time is going to prove to her that I don’t care.

That’s the Mom guilt talking.

If I looked at my life from an objective point of view, I’d notice how I bring her to dance class every week and watch her dance from the waiting room with a proud, goofy smile on my face. I’d notice that we go to story time and pick out new books together. I’d notice all the times that we went to the beach last summer. I’d notice that we pick every fruit we can at the local farm. We visit her friends. We build block castles. We dance around the house. We have hour-long bedtimes with stories and songs…

If I was to be objective, I’d say, I’m doing ok.

Moms spend way too much time feeling guilty. Mom guilt – you know what I’m talking about. It’s the worse kind of guilt. That guilt that comes from feeling like every decision you make has the potential to do irreparable damage to your children. The worry that you’re going to pass on all of the issues that you have from your childhood and they will be unable to function as adults because of it.

“She’s an only child so I have overcompensate by giving her attention all the time. Or I have to get her around kids so she can socialize more.”

“All of her friends her age are starting preschool soon. I wasn’t planning on school for a couple more years. What if she ends up behind?”

“Most of my mom friends make way more money than I do. They must be so much smarter than me. I must not be good enough at…anything.”

Add to that the extra layer of guilt that comes from running a business with kids underfoot. Every minute you spend on your business, you wonder if you should be spending more time with your kids…and vice versa.

In the words of Elsa, I declare “Let It Go”!

LET IT GO

Let go of the worry that you are hurting your child somehow by spending time on your business. Let go of the embarrassment when you’re on the phone with a client and your child won’t stop talking to you, even if just to say “Mommy on the phone?” 100 times.

ENOUGH already!

This is my life. I’m a mom. I run a business. The 2 will overlap. That’s my choice. That’s what’s right for me. Anyone who thinks it’s unprofessional or that it makes me less qualified to do my job isn’t a client that I want to work with. End of story.

Maybe┬áthis has caused my business to grow slower than it could have. Maybe we’ll have a few years with less money than we’d like. But I can’t go through everyday with regrets. (Well, I’m trying to have no regrets. It’s a work in progress.) I may not be able to do everything perfectly but I’m trying to do what’s important to me right now. I’m carving out my place in this Mompreneur world, and dealing with my own issues as I go (and boy does running a business AND being a mom bring the issues to the surface).

I am ENOUGH…as I am today. Tomorrow I will grow, and that will also be enough. Stop pushing perfection. Stop fighting with your life and start going with the flow.

I know I only have a few more years home with my daughter before she starts school. My business will always be there. She may not always want extra snuggle time with me. She may not always want to make pancakes together. For now, I’m done apologizing for not doing things “right”. THIS is my right. This is my choice. This is my life.

I’m Letting It Go!

What guilt have you been holding on to? What positive can you replace it with so that you can “Let It Go”. Please share in the comments or on Facebook!

Like What You've Read?

If so, please join the other Beyond the Front Desk followers who receive bi-weekly content marketing tips and receive a FREE COPY of my Content Marketing Starter Kit! Click on the button below to get started!

I will never give away, trade or sell your email address. You can unsubscribe at any time.

Tags: , ,

Leave a Reply

CommentLuv badge